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![]() ![]() ![]() Viva La Girlf! 04/15/2002 - 2:23 p.m. Never let it be said that old Red can't act like a supreme yoyo on occasion. Case in point: The show this weekend. The band is doing two sets, and I do one of my specialty numbers in each set. In the first set, I do the eeevil masked wrestler, and in the second, the scientist. The show as a whole rocks, and my numbers are also pretty good, at least judging by the response I get from the audience. Which is where the yoyo-osity comes in. Y'see, this was the first time the girlf was gonna see me do my schtick. I really wanted her to be there - I was definitely looking forward to it. I mean, she heard some stuff by my old band, and she claimed to like it, but she hasn't experienced the real true patented Red Blur Big Loud Noise in person. And it's important to me that she dig it. I mean, if she doesn't, I'll survive, but the reason I do this stuff is so people will like it, right? Right. And especially my girlf. She knew the show was supposed to start around 10, but she also had to head out of town that afternoon, so we didn't really know when she'd get there. 10 of 10, and she and her pals haven't shown yet. I go out back to hang with the band as they suit up, cuz I don't need to don my gear till halfay through the set. Going out back was apparently a mistake, as will be seen later. Now, I didn't really realize it at the time, but I think I was probably a lot more nervous about her being there than I thought I'd be. Cuz because, ya know, what if she doesn't like it? That would, I think, be sad, in a way. And also a drag. And stuff. Anyway, I go out and intro the band, the set starts, and I look around the club, and she ain't there. Some of my other pals are there, but no girlf. The set goes on, rock rock rock, and I go to put on my outfit for the wrestler number. Still no girlf, which bums me out cuz the wrestler is a mighty fine number, full of rock and humor, and I'd like her to see it, cuz the next show is probably gonna be the scientist again, which she'll see tonight if she ever effing shows up! Now, the whole wrestler schtick is that this eeeevil masked wrestler wants to take The Belt away from the lead singer of the band. So he keeps coming by, challenging the singer, does his theme song, and they go at it. This club was too dang small for real wrestling, so the wrestler just challenged the singer to a real match at the next show, which was kinda cheap free advertising. So, I'm rocking, and there's this rather cute, slinky, rock chick next to the stage, and she keeps coming up to me (yes, onstage, which is really just the floor) and checking out my biceps and my ridiculous stuffed package, and just generally flirting. O'course, she also manages to whack me in the teeth with the mic, so I am now Broken Tooth Joe. Yummy. It's not bad, but it does mean I need to go see the dentist now. Anyway, song ends, I threaten the auidience and run backstage, where I get out of my gear and return to the front room. One of the great mysteries of the wrestler is that although he is masked, people quite regularly recognize me as him when I'mm outta costume. And darned if slinky rock chick doesn't sidle on up to me and start making with the schmooze. Now, all this time, I'm keeping my eyes open for the girlf and her pals, but I have to admit, my head was getting just a wee bit turned by all the attention I was getting from Slinky Rock Chick. Now, I don't mean I was getting all hung up on her or nothing, but I was enjoying it. Ithas, after all, been a long time since I was the target of that kinda power flirting. And, to my shame, I kinda flirted back. Anyway, the girlf finally shows, and, man, it was weird. I guess four things happened at once - one - I had been so keyed up waiting for her to show, mostly without realizing it, that when she finally did show I was actually kinda peeved. I mean, come on, you couldn't get here on time? And worse, it turns out that they had come on just before ten, decided they were hungry, and went back out to go someplace for food. Yup, the 5 minutes I was backstage. So that was one thing. Number two, this is the first time in a long time that I've had a date come to one of my shows. And I had a very hard time figuring out how to fit her into that part of my world. Cuz, it's not really her scene, she likes music and going to shows, but to her it's more like, here we are at the show, there's the band, now it's over good bye, and it's much more an integral part of my life. And I had a hard time figuring out how to bring her into it comfortably, although that's exactly what I wanted to do. Three, I got a very bad vibe off one of her friends from the word go, and that was bad news. Fourth, I felt weird and creepy about the SRC, who was not stopping flirting with me even though it was pretty effing obvious I was with my girlf after that. And so I did the smartest thing I could do - I acted all peevish and a bit standoffish to the girlf, interspersing that with moments of attention and affection. Yay, Red. You are so smart. SMRT. The girlf ain't no dummy, o'course, and she was well aware of the weirdness, but she tried to make the best of it, though she did get quite catty about the SRC. "Stripper," she asked at one point, "or wannabe?" "Um, she's a singer," I said, having discovered this during our flirting phase. "But she could be a stripper too." Anyway, I did my next number, and I spent the reast of the night avoiding the SRC, and hung with my girlf, trying to repair the weirdness, though fairly unsuccessfully. After the set, she gave her pals the keys to her car so she could ride home with me, which was awful damn good of her, in my opinion, cuz she'd have been well right to tell me to go climb a tree. This, by the way, is not the end of Red's yoyo-ism for the night. As we drive home, I'm getting more and more peeved with the girlf. Why? Good danged question. I think that it is because she hadn't brought the whole nonsense up, and I was expecting her to, and so I was getting anxious. Finally, I said, "You know, I'm sory I've been acting so peevishly," and it was on. And ya know what? My girlf is pretty spanking smart, and insightful, and just an all around prize. Cuz danged if she didn't have some pretty swell insights into what I'd been doing, and double-danged if what could have been a nightmarish argument didn't turn into a really useful and important conversation that made things even better between us. Why she wants to hang around with a goof like me I'll never know. Music to act like a jerk by: Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds - "Do You Love Me?" (Let Love In) I found her on the night of fire and noise Wild bells rang in a wild sky I knew from that moment on That I would love her till the day that I died See what I did there? I went and moved my diaryring to a rings and reviews page! ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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